The Game is Afoot
by Arbitrary Escape
Summary: Hikigaya Hachiman thought he was done with bishounen tennis players once middle school was over.
1. Armageddon, engaged

Summary: Hikigaya Hachiman thought he was done with bishounen tennis players once middle school was over.

Rating*: K+

*Listed by chapter, each might be subject to change through future edits, story set to T for safety/default

Characters*: Hikigaya Hachiman, Totsuka Saika

*Each chapter will have a focused list for that particular chapter

Tags*: humor, slice of life, gen

*Tags will differ per chapter as well; e.g. some might have romance involved, too

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 **Disclaimer: Characters are owned by Watari Wataru and Konomi Takeshi**

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Most people would consider me a wallflower; a cursory glance and my rather distinctly dark presence was enough to say that I wasn't someone to keep your eye on. I guess it didn't help that I stayed far away enough from the crowds to dissuade people from looking at me much to begin with, and my attitude and general lack of awakeness was good reason to skip over me.

However, when one _did_ look at me, they would be rather surprised, my little sister told me. I was, unlike some other wallflowers, not particularly bad looking, according to her.

Of course, I obviously dismissed that thought, despite Komachi's pouts and reassurances (that was what little sisters were for, after all!). I told her that she should clear her head because I had no idea what she was going on about.

I looked at myself objectively; I was tall enough, he supposed, that might warrant some level of distinction in Japan (I currently stood at a rather respectable one hundred and seventy-nine centimeters). My other distinct feature was that my eyes were less than ideal; rotten, most called them. My smile was somewhat charming, I guessed, but only after you got used to it, which, honestly, defeated the point of 'being attractive', as I doubted I would really have many female friends I would be comfortable enough to smile around _that_ often.

Don't even get me started on my hair. That bird's nest was a bit unkempt, with my having grown it out quite a bit since the first year of high school. It was a bunch of thin, wiry locks that layered over one another and framed my face.

So yeah, just like everyone else's hair. In short: nothing special about me. At all.

Though, I can admit that I'd been garnering more stares ever since I got those glasses. Probably because they made my eyes weirder or something. Eh. You win some, you lose some.

I was enjoying my sort-of-sleep, until a good whack on the back of my head woke me up - Hiratsuka-sensei's greetings were getting more and more destructive, I thought absentmindedly. If she kept that up, I would probably just get a concussion one day from the sheer impact of her knuckles against my scalp. I yawned and raised my head up, rubbing my eyes as I did so and managed to catch my teacher exiting the classroom.

"Good morning, Hachiman!" Ah yes; his lovely little angel. Sweet, sweet perfection.

I turned to my left and beheld the glory of my personal cherub. That smile was beautiful as midsummer's day, an ode to the sweet touch of spring. A crooked smile worked itself onto my face as I brushed some hair behind an ear. "Good morning, Totsuka."

He blushed, but I couldn't figure out why; hell, _I_ should be the one blushing. Oh well, I thought, Totsuka's just too cute like this. Apparently, starting at Totsuka made him blush even more intensely. He sat there hugging his hands to his chest, ever the picture of innocence.

Sadly, his Totsuka-time was interrupted by the ringing of the school bell and the familiar yelling of _Siddown and shaddup!_ Sensei was so fun to listen to when she was moody, but it was a pity she was just a bit too loud in the mornings; if she was just a touch quieter in homeroom, she'd probably be perfect.

"Ahem! Alright, class," she began, "today, we've got a new student. He's just moved over here from Kanagawa, but don't be strangers. Make him feel welcome!" Huh, I thought. Interesting, I thought to myself. A bit far but I'd been over there a few times before.

Note to future self: whenever your gut tells you something bad is about to happen, listen to it and run.

The door opened, and in walked someone I hadn't seen in a few months.

"Ah."


	2. Joker meets world

Summary: Is it that hard to imagine that I have any friends outside of school?

Rating: K+

Characters: Hikigaya Hachiman, Niou Masaharu, minor Yuigahama Yui

Tags: humor, slice of life, gen

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 **Disclaimer: Characters are owned by Watari Wataru and Konomi Takeshi**

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"Hachiii," the new student whined as he jumped on the my back. Oof. My poor, poor back, I sighed. He was intent on making things difficult around me, that's for sure. So much for wallflower-hood.

Even though it was time for lunch, he didn't have to act all that 'friendly;' he could have just made himself comfortable by pulling up a chair. But nope, that's not enough for him alright. Had to wait for me to get up before he decided to do anything else other than pout at me.

"Haru," I said dryly. "Couldn't you have, oh, I don't know, _not_ done that in class?" Cue more gasps around the class, stares, and fingers pointed. I didn't really care that much, though I took note of Yuigahama's "o" shaped mouth and Totsuka's (happy?) squeal.

"Pft. Don't be such a stick in the mud, Hachi." God. Damn it. I palmed my face and massaged my temples. I could literally feel Masaharu's grin float through the air.

When I looked up, I was met by an ocean of onlookers. I blinked. "What are you all looking at?"

"Hikki!" Yuigahama walked up to me shyly as everyone else blended back into their usual mixes of cliques; a good sign that things were heating up for just the moment.

She, of course, acted as the class medium, and asked the long-awaited, stereotypical question. "How do you guys know each other?" Her voice was a bit uncertain and she seemed to frown a little at how close we were - maybe she was raised too traditionally?

It might also have been the fact that I let him continue to drape himself over me, but that would have implied that she was jealous: a.k.a., an impossibility.

"Well, Yuigahama," I said, "that's a question I honestly am unsure of how to answer." She frowned at us but it soon changed into an accepting smile - she was cute like that, you know? I smiled back at her and thought she'd walk back to her clique of friends, but she just flushed that cute little hue of red people do when they're embarrassed (what else could it be?) and sat down in an empty seat close to us.

Thinking about it, I turned to look at Masaharu. He looked back. We both totally didn't remember. However, turning to one another was decidedly a bad move though, at the time I completely didn't think so because I forgot the consequences of what that would look like to the public eye. An excited scream tore through the air as fujoshi fanatic number one tore her way through the desks and stopped in front of us to take pictures.

Haru blinked. "Are you always like this?" The fujoshi nodded and smiled, actually smiled the happiest I'd ever seen her (not that I saw her often, anyway).

"Could you guys lean in?" It was a whisper but unfortunately, that joker caught it. He grinned at me. He grinned at her. Fuck.

His next move was to koala me and leave his head in the crevice between my head and shoulders, opting to lean in as he did so.

Yaoi fangirl screaming was apparently a natural, inborn trait in the female species of class 2F, even though only one of them was a true fujoshi. How did I know this? More than one person had unhealthy bloodloss and Ebina actually started to wobble forward.

Luckily, I caught her before she could face-plant. Unluckily, she got an even closer view of us.

There was definitely some sort of mistake because apparently we'd be wasting so much time that the bell rang and Hiratsuka-sensei came back in and forced us back into our seats, leaving me to later fend off the oncoming invasion.

.

.

.

Crap. I never got to eat Komachi's bento that she (diligently) made and packed for me!

I glowered at Haru, who only waved to me as he walked away. Son of a bitch.


	3. Hallways and Haru

Summary: In which the owner of a Niou-named puppy shows him around the school

Rating: K+

Characters: Hikigaya Hachiman, Niou Masaharu

Tags: humor, slice of life, gen

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 **Disclaimer: Characters are owned by Watari Wataru and Konomi Takeshi**

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I walked down the hall, ignoring glances and whispers as I casually made my way towards the clubroom, wondering just how weird this day was going to get.

Chance was a powerful force, honestly speaking.

I hummed a rather odd (read: cheery) tune to myself and was confused by the jaw-dropping around me - I didn't think humming was anything special - but nevertheless enjoyed my leisurely stroll. My nice, casual, lonely walk.

That happened to be not alone.

Haru was following behind me fidgeting with some sort of completely asinine device that had no purpose but spinning. I'd told him enough times in the past that if he wanted to mess with something, he should make a worthwhile investment in Rubix cubes.

Bastard thinks they're worthless, and apparently his little gadgets were far more impressive.

"We're almost there, Haru."

Silence. I must've been lost in my thoughts to have not noticed that he disappeared or something. Shit. Did he walk away? Please, please, please don't let him get into trouble.

Instead, I turned around and was met with one of the dumber things I've seen in a school (and believe me, I see Hayama's clique everyday) and found this man-child rolling on the ground. I guess I was stupefied because apparently I had given up on even groaning. Why am I friends with this idiot again?

"I'm leaving you." I began to make some strides down the hall, fast enough that I was far enough from him that he'd have to actually stretch his legs if he wanted to keep up, but not too far that he couldn't see me. Unfortunately, I couldn't let this idiot get lost.

Another two minutes of walking and I'd finally made it to the clubroom. Huh. There was a new voice in there and it was actually talking to Yukinoshita. Without her snarkiness.

It was decidedly male, even though it was ridiculously soft. It also sounded like someone else I knew, but Totsuka wasn't at the service club, I was pretty sure. It was still familiar, but I couldn't place my finger on it.

Curiosity about who it was won over my eavesdropper needs. As the door opened, I was met with a two turning heads and a beautifully wide smile.

One that left nightmares in the hearts of every child unfortunate to spend more than two hours with him (source: me), and one that Haru told me was the stuff of legends when you ticked him off (i.e. lost at tennis or slacked off during practice).

What were the odds of meeting two transfer students you knew well enough, amirite or am I right?


	4. Death by Sadist

Summary: When two sadists come together, Hikigaya Hachiman's life becomes increasingly complicated.

Rating: K+

Characters: Hikigaya Hachiman, Yukimura Seichi, minor others

Tags: humor, slice of life, gen

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 **Disclaimer: Characters are owned by Watari Wataru and Konomi Takeshi**

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"So," I started off, feeling an oncoming headache. "You're here too, Mura." What the hell was that smile? I started sweating as he held it for ten seconds (it felt like five minutes!). Was it warm in here? Nervously, I switched my attention elsewhere. A spike of displeasure washed over me. I looked at Yukinoshita. Huh. I could feel the blizzard making its way down town.

That wouldn't do. Not at all. You'd think that the extreme heat and the cold would negate one another. Guess again.

I turned towards the windows and looked outside as I sat on top of the counter and pried one open. A fresh gust of wind was enough of a cool breeze that I felt calm as it tickled my locks and gently brushed them about. Unfortunately, some hair got all over my face and my fingers were given the task of combing it away.

A huge squeak - was that Yuigahama? She must've been frightened half to death by the ongoing stalemate of hellflame and arctic winds, the poor girl - brought my attention back to others. Huh? It must've been my imagination because apparently everyone in the room was a little flushed. I blinked once. Skin tones normal. Nah, must've been my imagination.

Yukimura stepped closer and glared at me. I continued to wait for him to say something and fiddled a bit more with my hair to waste more time (i.e. pretend I was otherwise occupied). Everyone else seemed to glow various shades of pink and red. I glanced at the obvious source: Mura. That, I knew for sure was a guarantee. Attractive son of a bitch! I wish I could get people to look at me like that; at least, when I wanted them to, I thought with a sigh.

"If you were in this school, why haven't you come by to see me?" Bitch, you just got here today (of that, I'm almost certain; there's no way in _hell_ our tennis club would've been this bad if he was here all along). "Don't you miss me?" The underlying threat in that voice was a threat that pressed against the hairs of my skin, prickling me with a new, undisguised level of fear. Yukinoshita should take pointers.

My hands automatically waved themselves up in surrender as I tried to explain that that's why I was here now and that everything was okay.

Then, all of a sudden, everything stopped. The wave of nausea? Dropped. The air felt breathable again, thank God. He pouted. What the..? One-eighty, much? "Why aren't you calling me Sei?" Many choked throats, given the number of coughs and one laughing trickster.

I scratched a cheek. "...I thought that was only for when we're alone?"

Mura beamed; I couldn't recall the last time he was that pleased.

Whoa! Was that a soul coming out of Yuigahama's mouth? And what the heck was up with Yukinoshita? For some reason, whatever I said made Mura pleased, given by his smile, and of course it made Haru double-over in laughter as he clutched his sides. Honestly, I didn't get it - what was so funny?


	5. Open mouth, Insert foot

Summary: Pretty people, unite! Against Hikigaya, of course.

Rating: K+

Tags: humor, slice of life, gen

* * *

 **Disclaimer: Characters are owned by Watari Wataru and Konomi Takeshi**

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"So, let me get this straight," Haru said. "You're in a club with these two," he took a glance at said people, "lovely ladies and you have not dated (or tried to date) either one of them?" His face morphed into some sort of of wrinkled mess. A sudden thought occurred to him. "Are you gay?"

For all intents and purposes, Haru's whispers weren't the best. Of course, he almost always acted as intended. You just had to find out why later. For me, it almost always equalled a pain in the ass. My eyes drifted to the other three people in the room, all of whom were rather flushed, even Mura!, and I had no idea what to say. Of course, the joker had to tack on a final comment. "Just saying, I swing both ways," he finished with a deliberately-sort-of-not-subtle wink.

I wasn't about to open up the can of worms that was my sexuality, but I much preferred the company of females. So I thought to respond. But, as they say, open mouth, insert foot. "Me too." Shit.

Everyone's eyes snapped open at that; Yuigahama's hands slammed over her mouth. Wow, she must _really_ have been raised conservative because those were actual tears in her eyes. Yukinoshita, too, I guess; she was usually more reserved and composed, regardless of her thoughts on the subject. But I saw a redness across her cheeks and a glimpse of downcast hurt in those eyes. Geez, I didn't know that my sexuality could do that to someone.

Meanwhile, Mura's smile only grew wider. Yikes. Haru, on the other hand, was flabbergasted. He knew he was joking. But he knew I wasn't joking. No matter what I said next, these two would never believe me.

"Uhh…" I searched for the right words.

"Wow, Hikigaya," oh no… "I didn't know you were like that." I stiffened and turned to the voice. How long had she been there? I hadn't even heard the door open. As much as I loved her, as a student of course, Hiratsuka-sensei was definitely someone who did _not_ need to know more about me. Especially not on a personal basis. "You know, if you ever need a shoulder…"

My mind was made; there was no room for hesitation. I stood up to my full height and placed both hands on her shoulders. An expression that would most easily described as 'startled,' or perhaps 'shocked,' crinkled across her face. I had to cut her off quickly before I lost control of the conversation, "No, sensei. I'm fine. As long as this does _not_ get back to Ebina, _everything is okay_." My tone brooked no argument, my words a wrathful smite of judgment.

I turned my attention to the rest of the room. "Got it?"

All hands were in the air. Hiratsuka-sensei swallowed.

I smirked. Wow, no mentions of _Gross!_ Or _Ew!_ ; my heart almost melted. An awkward silence passed through the room. Then, something clicked. I had almost forgotten. "Wait, so, why are you here, Mura, Haru?"


End file.
